In the newspaper business there is no such thing as writer’s block. If you’ve been out covering a story and you find yourself staring at a blank screen not sure what to write, then you haven’t done enough reporting.
That means you haven’t asked enough questions, talked to enough people or researched the topic enough.
The same can be said for finding your purpose in life. If you don’t know what your purpose is yet, it’s not that you don’t have one, it’s that you haven’t done enough digging. If you’re stumped, then you have to get to know yourself.
Like (cringe) really know yourself.
The magic of intuition
When we are children, we know who we are. But then the waters get muddied by all of the “you shoulds” and “don’t dos.” Some of these rules, such as don’t run into the the street without looking or you should get a good education, keep us safe and enrich our existence.
But some rules, many of them self-inflicted, can get us into a habit of life by committee or following the crowd. Our crystal-clear instincts of childhood become blurred by years of following what other people want and ignoring our intuition. Intuition will never fail you. It is there to protect and guide you. Always and forever.
But very few people have the resolve to keep their focus on their purpose, so don’t beat yourself up too much. Your purpose is still there. You just need to find it.
Dig beyond the doubt
These 25 questions will help you get closer to that purpose.
And guess what? There's one rule you have to follow: You must tell the truth truth. Being completely honest with yourself builds trust. When you build trust with yourself, you can lean on your intuition and let go of what your ego is telling you.
If you find that statement hard to believe, then you have some trust-building to do. Your purpose isn’t about what you think you know, it’s about what you know you know.
When I was pregnant with my twins, I didn’t have proof I was having twins until week 13, but I knew it. My intuition was on overdrive. My ego was like, "No, hon the doctor said only one baby. You have the 6 week ultrasound and you saw one little heart thumping away on the screen. Twins? Now, that’s just silly."
But my intuition was like, “Don't hon me. This can’t be right, there are two babies. The end!” Sure enough, I got a surprise and yet comforted at the same time that there were two babies.
Okay, so this is an extreme example of knowing something despite the doubt. What about the little instances? You’re humming a song and turn on the radio to hear that song? Your intuition says, don’t leave your keys there, you’ll lock them in the car. Your ego says Pffft, I would never do that ... and what happened?
Don't fall in
It’s likely that your intuition has been telling you what your purpose is. But it may seem crazy to you ego. Next time this happens, don’t listen to your ego. Listen to your intuition.
When you answer the questions at the end of this post, you may start to slide into two traps. These traps keep the truth truth from surfacing:
1. the what-I-think-people-will-think-about-me
2. the lies-I-tell-myself-that-I-want-so-much-to-be-true.
Let’s look at the traps.
What I think people think about me
A ot of times, we create lies to protect our egos, This is the what-we-think-people-will-think of us trap, How many times have you said to yourself, "I don't want people to think I'm ..." or "People don't like me, they think I'm ... I’ve gotten stuck here a lot. Especially when I wanted to make a good impression on people. Bosses. Boyfriends. Business partners. But the truth truth is, in the words of Dr. Phil McCraw: No one is thinking of you as much as you think they do.
Thinking you know what other people are thinking is an illusion. A big ol' fat lie. You will never know what other people are thinking. So what about what they think about you (if they think about you at all). It doesn't matter. Don't waste another nano-second relying on that drivel.
BTW: Lying is bad. Please, don’t try to be a Ferrari when you’re a minivan. Have you ever tried to do a Costco run -- with the kids -- in a Ferrari?.
Lying to yourself probably got you into some relationships, jobs, locations, situations and awkwardness that you would rather forget about. Wanting those lies to be true cost you way more time than the lie did. I’ve been there. It sucks.
The good news is that when we dig through the illusions and lies, we find the truth. People who know themselves have already found their gleaming hunk of truth. Get a pen and a piece of paper and get digging. Let me know how it goes.